Motherhood: How to find time for yourself after a new baby

Being the mother of two kids – one of them being a newborn – can be very challenging on its own. I know it was for me. 

Between the diaper changes – the poop inspections, the feedings, being free entertainment, teacher, life coach [insert the myriad of other roles here] and the homework, you hardly have time to take a proper shower (let alone relax). 

Now add taking care of the home, your spouse (and by that I mean intimacy) and trying to start/run a business and you have a recipe for disaster. I’m talking about no more long  showers, piles of laundry (clean and dirty), no time for fancy hairdos, gorilla-Sasquatch season.

Because it’s so easy to forget to take care of yourself and so difficult to find time for some well needed “Me-Time”, this post is dedicated to giving you a few ideas on how you can squeeze in that wax/shave we all know is looooong overdue ?.

Utilize nap time.

This is probably my number one tip. As a matter of fact, you don’t even need the other tips as much as you need this one. 

If you have one kid off at school, then praise the mother! You only have to tackle one (the newest member of the family) at least for the next few hours. 

Your little dictator will eventually take naps. Even though they might be 30 minutes at most, that will feel like A LOT of time. Make the most of this time. Remember to take naps yourself because trust me mama, you’ll need it. 

However, since I’ll get at least 2-3 naps out of my little one for the day, my routine is to take a nap with the baby during ONE of those naps and use the other nap times to be Supermom. #momtrepreneur!

Use the older kids.

Now I think it goes without saying that you should NEVER leave your young baby alone with your toddler (with a teenager? Maybe…you might be able to get away with that) however, remember the hat-of-the-entertainer that you wear? Guess what you can do with that? That’s right. Give it to the older kid(s). 

How do I do that? Well, simple: baby is in the same room as I am, my other child is there with me also, I encourage him to play with his little brother. This buys me enough time to fold the week old laundry I have piled up while fostering a bond between siblings. All while allowing me to keep an eye on both of them. #smartmama

Don’t forget about daddy dearest.

While dad is away at work, mom is stuck with the baby and hardly has time to do anything. When dad gets home, he gets to be on duty for a while, buying mom at least an hour of R&R time. 

Now remember mommies, daddy is tired too so don’t be insensitive. I’m not talking 5 hours at the hairdresser/nail tech or gossiping with the girls. I’m talking a nice 60 minutes, or so, to put on your favorite type of music, ACTUALLY shower, get a quick shave in, make a couple Facebook posts, scroll through Instagram for a bit, read a few more pages of that book you’ve been trying to read for the past 3 weeks or doing something towards your business. 

Side note: if you’re lucky enough to have daddy work from home, you have the added benefit of being able to utilize daddy’s breaks.

Don’t be afraid to accept help from other family members.

Now I know we all have that overbearing aunt who is super judgmental and thinks she knows it all and you should do exactly as she says because she’s raised 6 kids and they’ve all turned out fine despite the fact that three of them are in jail?. 

Or that cousin who thinks it’s perfectly fine to be gluing their mouth to your baby’s face every ten seconds (ps. I don’t let people kiss my baby. I couldn’t care less about who wants to be offended by me saying “don’t kiss my baby” because the money to take him to the doctor when you give him something – cousin Mavis – will come out of MY pocket). 

Where was I? Right. I’m not saying you should accept help from family members that make you feel uncomfortable, and most definitely not from the ones that constantly judge you. But from those few that really try to understand and are non-judgmental and genuinely want to help? Accept the help. 

If you can get help to clean the bathroom or the kitchen, then that’s one less task you have to do and possibly a little more time you can dedicate towards yourself or your business or whatever you want.

Utilize a sitter.

There’s no shame in having a sitter come over for 2 to 3 hours to watch the kids while you try to focus on something else. That could be building your business, your online presence, or just plain old me-time and taking care of yourself. You need it. You deserve it.

Just remember to hire a reliable sitter. And if you’re super paranoid like I am, do a background check if possible. Find out if other moms have used this sitter before and what their experiences were. And don’t leave your kids ALONE with said sitter until YOU completely trust her (or him. Men can be sitters too).

Take care of yourself…

It’s easy to forget about yourself when you have to play so many different roles all the time. But one key thing to remember is that you can’t effectively take care of anyone if you don’t take care of yourself. So see, Me-Time as an investment in yourself. 

However, you choose to spend it – provided you actually relax, since that’s the whole point – see it as a necessary part of the process. Even Supermom needs a break sometimes. #supermoms #momtrepreneurs #yougotthisgirl

Remember sharing is caring so don’t forget to share this article with all your new mom friends. Let’s help each other figure it out together. You can also join the discussion in my Facebook group or leave your comments below. I would love to hear from you.

–Cheers! ✌?